April 21, 2017

Never Have I Ever

Owned a pair of white breeches.


April 12, 2017

Light up, light up As if you have a choice

I watched a video today on coke mixing with stomach acid That's me right now. Burnt colored sludge. I hate it. Work is a struggle. My horse situation is at times a struggle. I think there is a connection here. I'm a struggle...

I really need to break out of my rut(s). I know it will happen. I'm cyclical after all.

My friend wants to go to a GHM clinic happening soon.  That should be interesting. And Jane Savoie has one that same month I would love to go to as well. And hey, according to fb, stick horse riding competitions are a thing. So there's always hope, right?

March 22, 2017

February 21, 2017

State of the Blog

Big  old sigh.

1) I ordered a saddle,  it still isn't here.  It is nothing fancy.  Well,  it is to me. But it isn't expensive.  I indulged myself and got an old pancake saddle.  An Hermes Steinkraus.  I'm super excited about it because it is true close contact.  They are also designed with Tbs in mind and  that is my current interest and budget.

2) I had a horse on trial,  but after the Bay,  I'm not willing to chase white rabbits or dragons down the medical  rabbit hole.  She was a nice mare that has some baggage that we could have worked through,  but  when the involuntary reaction to pain is excessive... Well,  mayne not a resale project. At least we got that out of the way before purchase.

3) Going to HT at Meadowcreek to have fun with my little pony friend.  It is only starter level,  but he needs some confidence building.

4) I asked a little blogging bird about any ottbs that may be looking for new careers soon.  So think good thoughts.

5) I'm dying in  corporate America.

That is all.

January 10, 2017


I'm not  one  for  new years resolutions.  I think every day can be a day  to start anew.  Seriously,  it's gotten  me thru  tough times to channel my inner Scarlett O'Hara.  If you've been down there... You know.

My job,  well,  career,  is wearing me  down.  I'm not here to bitch about it.  But,  the struggle bus sometimes  has to pull over  on the highway because it is broke the fuck down.  But,  I have  been binging a podcast at work that helps me make it thru.

What I like about it,  is it is completely authentic.  OK yes,  it is the F Word Murder Mystery show.  There is cursing.  There is a lack of facts,  but there is genuineness that I love.  It isn't about the murders,  it is about the victims.  About the survivors.  About freaking humans and how we are amazing,  and effed up,  and crazy and amazing.

These two women began this for fun,  and  it has grown. How amazing is that to do something that interests you,  you are completely yourself,  and  it is accepted?  It makes me super happy.  Authenticity should be so much more rewarded.

I haven't been reading other blogs as much as I should or want.  Or reading and  not responding.  But there is someone's story who is stuck in my mind right  now.  I'm so sad for her,  having been in a similar situation.  But hers just seems even more heartbreaking.  But I know she's strong and  will be OK.  But it sucks to see the pain in someone.  Or I guess,  someone  in pain.

I dunno.  But I'll leave  with some  insightful  stuff.

Stay sexy. Don't get murdered.

December 30, 2016

Some words and stuff

It's been an interesting year.

There has been good. There has been bad.

I guess you can't have one without the other.

That kinda sums up my year. There is stuff that I don't want to talk about. Well, I would love to, but I'm just a bit above it. People believe what they want to believe in the end. It pushes me more into myself. I am very much an Other. An outsider. So it's hard for me to be with people. I don't fit in, they don't get me. It's all very awkward.

But one thing I am very excited about is something I finally got myself. No. It's not a horse. But it goes on one.

To be completely honest, I'm afraid I'm losing my positivity. I'm sure it seems like I never have any. I try very hard to keep going. But while I still have happy thoughts and dreams. I just don't want to be with shitty people. And that is all I see 90% of the time. No, maybe they aren't deliberately trying to be shitty. It's just... How it is. However, there are a few people that still make me smile and believe that things are possible. I'll just be a weirdo. On my own. I mean what else is new? 😉

December 10, 2016

Blowin in the Wind

Not much going on. Plotting on how to get a horse down here.